“Everything should be made as simple as possible but no simpler.” Albert Einstein
What would be the simplest way to make the largest difference in someone’s life?
Ask an empowering question. Let it be The One Question To Change Your Life.
If you get to ask only one question of yourself or your clients, what would that one question be?
Quick, The One Question To Change Your Life is?
My 86 year old friend Jerry White’s answer was immediate, wonderful, and to the point.
If you could only ask one question to change somebody’s world it would be?
What would make you feel most alive?
Think about it. What if anything, is actually missing from your life:
The committed love of a romantic partner ?
The excitement of the new adventure?
A certain level of money?
Intimacy after Prostate Cancer Treatments?
Tools to get out of the RUT; Routine, Uninteresting, Tired relationship with your significant other?
Solution Action Steps:
Make a video of yourself, or have a friend interview you, or write in your journal, or talk to your coach or all of these about the following three simple action steps for discovery and change.
1. Choose any area of your life where you’d like to have a breakthrough, be it in terms of your results or a greater experience or both.
- Significant Other
- Personal Growth
- Physical Environment
2. Ask yourself (or have your friend ask you) what would make you feel most alive as it relates to that particular aspect of your life. An easy way to do this is to simply notice your energy as you contemplate or talk about a possibility. Make sure you spend the most time talking about the things you feel most alive talking about. This is where making a video of yourself is great.
If you’re asking these questions of a friend, watch their eyes and you will actually see them get brighter when they tap into something that really connects them with their aliveness, almost like watching a light go on inside a darkened room. Or, if asking these questions of yourself, notice if your feelings intensify and experience the brightness within expand.
3. Next for each life area complete the sentence starter ‘If I wasn’t afraid, I would .. . Do this with a new answer as many times as you can. Aim for at least six completions.
“If I wasn’t afraid, I would:
Example: Significant Other/Sex
If I wasn’t afraid, I would:
- Tell the whole truth to both myself and my partner at all times
- Take time for myself
- Ask open ended questions
- Daily show my significant other that she/he is the most important person in my world the way she/he most wants to be shown
- Ask for sex more often if I so desire
- Be more experimental
- Be less complaint to what she/he asks for and ask for more of what I want
- Listen from a place of caring rather than being a problem solver
- Write her/him poetry at least once a week as i did when we were first together
Please share The One Question To Change Your Life that has impacted you.
Virgil Beasley, Psy.D.
Coaching, Workshops, and Learning Aids email@example.com