I recently did an Executive Coaching workshop with 10 multi-millionaires. I asked, as an introduction icebreaker, that each of them refer to their “Wheel of Life” * that had been sent for them to fill out in advance.
The first man proudly shared about his 14 thousand square foot vacation home in the Sonoma wine country, an island in the Caribbean, a villa in Mexico and annual income of $5 million from two businesses he had started. He welled up with tears and his demeanor totally changed as he told of his failed personal relationships and family losses. “I have everything yet I have lost everything dear to me. I am having problems in my third marriage and have four children that I don’t know. It is difficult talking with my employees.” What an emotionally charged beginning!
Sobbing, he touched the woman next to him and shakily said, “Your turn.”
Her stature was awe inspiring. I felt honored to be in the presence of this level of success.
Following her “success accounting”, her total being also shifted to intense sadness. She too welled up with tears as she spoke of failed personal relationships and little contact with her children.
These mini-dramas were repeated throughout the remaining introductions.
I am finding this story of Ten Multi- Millionaires Declare Bankruptcy In One Afternoon showing up with increased frequency and intensity. It is not just with Executives and Managment but across world with all levels of employees being asked to do more with less and small business owners ever more challenged with balancing life and work.
Frequently, the experience is that of a tight rope walker in a one-ring circus. Are you paying more attention to keeping your balance than achieving desired results? Too many slices and not enough pie with the need to balance you against the opposing push and pull demands of these pieces of life? For most, bankruptcy occurs from responding to these externals as if they are a pie that needs to be cut into ever smaller pieces of life.
I am reminded of the question from the New Testament, Matthew “What profits a man to win the world and loose his soul?”
These Executives quickly began to realize that life work balance is about managing energy to create a bigger pie out of being internally “Want to” motivated instead of externally “Have To” motivated.
You too can do what I partnered with them in doing that brought them true wealth; fulfilling relationships, peace of mind, job satisfaction, optimum health, emotional freedom, spiritual and financial freedom.
1. Identify Priorities based on clear, core, personal values
What are you passionate about?
When and how are you fulfilled?
2. Create Your Personal Mission
What is the legacy you plan to leave?
3. Notice and write down your barriers and resources
What Attitudes, Beliefs, Expectations, Behaviors get in your way of honoring your values?
What are those that help you honor your values?
4. Establish Goals
How will you make your goals measurable and with time line specific action steps?
How will they be made attractive by your core values?
5. Include others in your balance quest
How will you permit others to assist you in holding yourself accountable for achieving and celebrating?
What instructions will you give your coach on how to be your most effective partner in raising the accomplishment bar for and with you?
Although Tiger Woods’ personal lifestyle took him out of the winner’s circle of golf for a number of years, he remains a sports child prodigy. It is reported that years ago when he was at the top of his game, Tiger took off 1.5 years to be coached on improving one specific aspect of his game; his back swing. He only won one major tournament the first half of that time. His subsequent record now speaks for itself of the returns on his investment. And then, while at the top of his game, he continued with two different coaches.
What would be your returns from working with a personal and professional coach?
- Wheel of Life Go to www.livingwell60plus.org to download your free copy of this inventory.
- “Daily Journal” While there, also download this tool to help you with your own Life-Work energy balance quest.
Virgil Beasley, Psy.D.
Coaching, Workshops, and Learning Aids email@example.com